The worst contraption ever

Many times I wonder, why is something that badly designed placed in every home, mall, and modern human architecture. Who the hell invented the TOILET BOWL!?

First, I'm going to start by saying how inconvenient the toilet bowl is for guys. This evil 'thing' was apparently designed by hardcore feminists. Why? Because the male, in order to not dirty the floor, has to bend his private part into an awkward position and shape, with the help of the hand, to urinate when he sits on the bowl. Gross! And in case my female readers are wondering - no, we do not like to do that.

Also by nature's law, we humans (and probably a good percentage of animals) squat to pass motion. *I'm sorry if my readers cannot visualise that because I cannot find an image to support my point. And after 21 years of shitting experience, I can conclude that it's much easier to poo (and kek sai) while squatting compared to having your buns pressed on COLD ceramic. Don't we all too remember the times when our poor buttocks get wet from the bombs we drop into the water?

Then comes the debate whether or not to put down the toilet seat after use. Why is it engineered to have a hinged seat in the first place?! Sometimes, accidents can happen, and I admit males sprinkle on the random occasion; dirtying the seat if it wasn't lifted up. No matter how thoroughly you wipe a public toilet seat, I can safely say the 精华's still there.

Some attempts have been made to correct the above problem: by enlarging the size of the toilet bowl, causing it to contain a HUGE pool of water, making splashes MUCH more frequent. Instead, we humans, should have persecuted the bastard who induced numerous quarrels with his/her dumb invention and proceed to boycott the toilet bowl.

Squats FTW!